If you're not usually one to speak up, Mintz suggests trying it solo first. "Next time you're masturbating, make some noise," she says. "You might find something is really fun, and then you can transfer that to partner sex." Otherwise, saying anything that's praising, instructive, and even a little dirty tends to go over well with men. Tell him exactly how you want to be touched (and where, and using what) and you'll his pleasure meter — and yours —through the roof.
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First (and most important), promise not to judge the other. Then, privately write out scenarios that have tantalized you and place them in a box. Next time you're feeling hot and heavy, pull one out. Either jump right into fulfilling that fantasy or, if you need a little more time to adjust, ask what it is about that fantasy that your partner likes, Dr. Kort says. "Sometimes, its themes can be addressed in different scenarios that feel comfortable for both of you," he adds.
#5 Use description. Men are visual, so, you want to make sure that when your dirty talking, you use a lot of description. Don’t be scared to go into detail of what you’d like him to do to you or you do to him. With description, he’ll be able to have a visual in his mind of you and that’s exactly what you want. Now, this doesn’t mean to use big words, keep it simple.
Your smell makes me weak in the knees – Dirty talk for dummies 101. This dirty phrase always works best for men and should be used whenever talking dirty to a man. It’s no secret that all men want their girl to be sexy and wild. They want her to say things that can turn him on in no time. So next time you are dirty talking in bed to your man and feel like indulging in super hot sex with your guy, use this phrase.
Never ever underestimate the power of a see-through teddy to get your guy standing tall. "Anything that makes a woman feel good in her body and sexually confident is very sexy," says sex and relationship therapist Megan Fleming, Ph.D. And nothing is sexier to your guy than confidence. I can personally attest to this fact; my man cannot resist this sexy little (and I emphasize little) red nightie that a nonchalantly stroll around in on occasion. But it's not even just wearing the lingerie. It's the tease, the sexy text you send him letting him know you bought some lingerie but he has to wait until the evening. Take your time and take charge, because the ball is in your court and your man wants it all.
Treat him with respect. This is the most important thing of all. Men hate being around someone who emasculates them, and a good man won't take long to leave such a person. Don't be afraid to help your man feel good about himself. A little known secret is that men are just as insecure as women. If he's with his friends or family be open to opportunities to let your man look like "the man". It will win his love and respect.
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So, your special night of you-fun may mean an extra-special blowjob — and there’s no doubt that’s special! — or that being the night you try something kinkier, like role-play, for the first time. That’s great. It may also be the time you go for anal sex, or try sex in the shower or car sex, or somewhere more adventurous. That can be super fun as well. But it doesn’t end there.
The compliments are not there just to boost his ego. They are also there so that he knows that even if you haven’t reached orgasm, you had a good time. Usually, women need more time than men to climax and that’s something natural. So, don’t make a big deal out of it. One of the next times you will get there, so don’t lower his self-esteem by saying you weren’t satisfied.
Of course, you’re going to be shown how to dirty talk, but there’s one thing about dirty talking that is the most important factor. When dirty talking, you need to feel comfortable and natural. If not, you’re going to show that you’re uncomfortable and uneasy with it. You don’t have to be a specific type of girl in order to dirty talk, you simply need to feel comfortable.
So what's a woman to do? First, understand that your guy's hasty retreat post-sex may be because he doesn't understand how much he craves a connection with you. Then, it's time for another kitchen table sex talk, Mintz says. "If he's been jumping in the shower right after sex for the last 10 years, he's going to be really taken off guard if, the next time he goes into the shower, you all of a sudden say it upsets you," she explains. "Instead, set aside a time to talk when the situation has passed."
Drop the games. Nobody likes a partner who plays "head games". This is deceptive, and will hurt anybody who trusts you. Be real, don't play games, and good men will respect you and may even pursue you. Playing head games will only make good men run away. Remember the communication thing? That is especially true here. If you like a guy, don't push him away and act like you don't like him. Tell him. Yes, there are some men who do like the thrill of the chase, but all good men genuinely want to respect you and your wishes, and will leave you alone if you insist on it. Remember, men communicate directly; if you act like you don't want him, he'll think you don't want him.
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