This article is surprisingly well written considering that most refer to manipulation of some sort. Yet, I would like to take a middle ground here in the positions taken by Eric Charles and Jennie. I think a fifth point, but moved to the top of the post should be on finding your own self love, and source of fulfillment independent of relationships, which helps you then do the second point say no to those who are not a good fit for you — i.e. know how to choose those compatible to you so that you can be yourself and also add value to his/her life. And yes, such relationships are reciprocal. It is not only the woman adding value, the man reciprocates as well. Both partners benefit. And commitment is a natural result, without having to manipulate the situation in any way. Thanks for offering different points of view.


Now the big problem is the guys i had in my past are somewhere in links with him and he is really in a very confused state to whether continue with this relationship and get into a commitment of marriage or not. he has forgiven me in every mistake.we are in a relation since 7 months and i almost broke his heart 20 times since then but he still stands by me in every situation,like yesterday my brother by chance got to know everything about us,in doubt that we are into physical relation with each other but he still is there for me and is ready to even talk to him.he cant see me crying.whatever i asks him he never says no.i have always created problems,troubles for him,he still says this is the last time and if anything happens again he will go away from me,but still he is here…i dont know how to solve this mess.firstly i want to tell my mother about our relation but the problem is he says we cant marry,,,so i dnt know how to tell my mother or convince her to accept our relation without us being into any future commitment.,,please help me anyone with this.

Hi, I am a 61 year old widow and dating a 62 year old man for going on 2 years now, he has never been married or in a serious relationship for any length of time before. He tells me randomly that he loves me and we spend almost all our time together. He is hesitant to move in with me because he says he wants to be 100% sure of his feelings. He says that sometimes he doesn’t feel love or attraction and then other times he does. He hasn’t been with anyone else since we met and we are neighbors and friends and enjoy doing multiple things together. I am trying not to push too hard because I have the feeling he does love me and maybe this will go somewhere. Other times, I doubt his love for me because he doesn’t just come out and make a commitment to me. Am I being too needy in wanting a commitment and him to move in with me after almost 2 years of dating? What advice would you give me in regards to this relationship? I have met his entire family and we spend holidays together with them and I get along great with them. He asks my advice on things and shares details of his past life and relationships and mistakes he has made in life. He also shares all his goals and dreams with me and asks me to help him make decisions on things because he has a hard time making decisions on things. I don’t want to hang on if there will never be love but at the same time I don’t want to let go of something good because he does treat me with respect and will randomly say I love you and is always hugging me and kissing me and doesn’t only demand sex out of the relationship.


The point is to keep an interesting sexual attraction to your partner going while you're away from each other. You can use any method of communication you prefer. However, at least two things come to mind. Texting is not as instantaneous as a voice call. You get no feedback from intonation as to whether your partner is liking it, and people are usually not entirely focused on a text conversation, at least not to the extent as a phone call. Also, remember that texts are usually kept. You may say some stuff in the heat of the moment, that you would not say in normal conversation. On the phone, there's generally no record of it.
"My girlfriend is uninhibited in the bedroom and one of the things she does that makes me crazy is, instead of asking for oral sex or dropping hints, she'll come up to me when I'm sitting on the couch, lift up her nightgown, and sit on my face and force me to start licking her. I mean, she isn't really 'forcing' me because I love it, but you get the point." — Jeff J., 37, Hudson Valley, NY

So you think you have a decent understanding of dirty talk which is great. But now, you’re a little stuck on what you could say to your man. With time, you’ll find the words and phrases that’ll turn you and your man on the most. However, in the beginning, you may feel a little stuck which is completely normal. I mean, it’s your first time doing this! Well, here are some words and phrases you can test out with your partner.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder. This isn’t something that only happens between people, but we miss things that we haven’t had in a long time. We miss things that are out of sight or out of mind. We are capricious in that way. When thinking about something that’s been absent for a while, we fantasize. And we augment our cravings. The same happens between people. If we are too much in someone’s face, they have a tendency to get sick of us. We need to disappear for a while, then reappear out of nowhere. If you’re willing to do this, not only will you surprise the guy, but you’ll have left him with some naughty fantasies to play with in your absence. And those fantasies will rise to the surface once he sees your face again.
How often do you feel that your partner is no more interested in you? Does he ignore you and takes you for granted? Well, if that’s the case with you then you really need to do something about it and learning some dirty sex talk may do the trick. We all know that every relationship fades with time and becomes frustrating and traumatizing. We feel restricted, bored, and lacks interest in each other. But that situation can be easily avoided if you are willing to put little efforts in your relationship to bring back the romance and charisma. Now you must be thinking what should you do to get the attention of the guy you love.
These tips really helped but I think I have a different reason than most of u guys, i needed this bcuz I like my neighbor and were only 2 years apart but he met my friend 1 time and likes her more than me but she’s a slut so I don’t want to be a slut to get him he still likes me but, he rated her 8 out of 10 but he rated me 7 1/2 which isn’t the problem it’s that he’d go out with her and not me…:( I’m really falling for him and I don’t know what to do! HELP!!!!????!!!
Please your man in bed by slowing down and revel in the warmth that your lovemaking brings. I have a friend called Gemma, she was single for several years before she met Matt. Because she'd been single for a while before she met Matt she thought that she should go all out in the bedroom to please him, she admits she quite often approached sex as though it was a race. When she was settled in the relationship and trusted Matt she stopped racing along in the bedroom with poor Matt on tow. Her advice to you is slow down, you don't have to race to the finish line to enjoy the togetherness that lovemaking brings.
Getting in sync with what your partner likes and dislikes is important for any intimate act, dirty talk included. "The key to successful dirty talk is making sure everyone is on the same page," Backe says. "In theory, if someone says something extreme to their partner that the partner is not prepared for or doesn't expect, it could make for an uncomfortable situation."
Remember the early days when you were in the first throes of lust when it was hard to keep your hands of each other? Most couples remember their initial years with affectionate nostalgia, so try and recreate those memories. Plan a nice dinner, reminisce about the first time you saw each other, what attracted you initially, and your first date. Recall the sexual connection, the pet names, personal jokes. Put on some sensuous music and dance around your living room to the song you first danced to. Recreate the thrill of having sex by doing it somewhere you might get caught! You share a rich history, so indulge in it a little - those that do are the couples that stay connected.
Eric I wanted to say thank you! All of your articles remind everyone of what is really important about life and happiness! I realize that it is time to stop chasing ones that don’t want to be chased by me! I know I have a lot to offer but I am excited to say I am not scared to be alone I love my life, my friends! I love this article because it just helps remind me that I don’t want a guy that brings out the crazy if he likes my vibe and we click I am not gonna worry cuz he will want more! If it changes stop worrying or trying because you don’t want to work on something that is onesided! You have opened my eyes to see that if I can’t see my worth and value how can I expect anyone else! So keep writing your honest and inspiring pieces! I am so excited about my future and all the adventures this year could bring! Xoxoxo
Please your man in bed with your sexy presence and he will truly enjoy the experience of being in bed with you. I have a friend called Thelma, she's 34 years old. She used to be quiet and shy and would never have dreamed of acting sexily. She used to think that she couldn't act sexily because her upbringing had been quite strict and sex was never discussed in the home. Then she met Peter and he was able to offer her the encouragement she needed to feel more sexy. Thelma says it is never to late to tap into your inner sexiness so that you too can bring your sexy side to the forefront when you are in the bedroom.
Everyone has a mental highlight reel when it comes to their history of making whoopee. But, please, for the love of all things delicate (like our fragile male egos), when the sex deed is already underway, do him a favor and spare him the play-by-play of your sex life leading up to that moment. There will be plenty of time to get into all that during the honeymoon.
#8 Accidental grazes. If a guy grazes your boobs or your butt accidentally, he can’t help but recollect the moment and get turned on by it. If you want to seduce a guy, make sure he *accidentally* gets to brush past your body now and then, be it while hugging him, while standing in an elevator, or even while pointing out something to him. [Read: 20 sexy questions to ask a guy and seduce him]

Never sleep with anger within you. The unwritten rule of a great relationship is to really talk. Be open and honest. Talk about things you don't like in each other, irritating habbits. But remember to discuss the positive traits too - communicate what's important in your relationship; simply talking about why you love each other can help keep the passion alive.


So, you have just started giving him the best oral sex ever. Now what? There are three types of men. Some men will get quickly excited when you perform oral and will climax quickly. Some men will take forever to climax and you may end up getting tired or frustrated, jumping into intercourse to get him off. Or, you have the perfect in-between when he will climax before your mouth, neck, throat, and hands tire. Regardless of the time it takes, he may eventually climax. The question is...do you spit or swallow when he finally reaches that point? Tip #15: Be prepared for a variety of outcomes. He may climax, he may not. He may stay hard, he may not. Despite the number of possibilities, you need to be prepared. There is nothing worse than if your man starts to lose his mojo and you react with frustration. He'll be frustrated and there is nothing worse for a man's ego than seeing a negative emotion on your face. Have a game plan. If he goes soft, start using your hands more, or explore other options (or blame it on yourself that your mouth or other areas of your body hurt). Sometimes taking the blame will ease the tension. Tip #16: If your man is about to climax, know the signs. This may be difficult if this is the first time you have ever performed oral, or if this is the first time that you have performed oral on this particular person. Most men will get extremely hard just before they are about to climax. Some will ejaculate with pre-cum just before they are ready to let loose. Their bodies will tense up. No matter what, don't stop! If he is about to get off from your amazing oral sex, don't drop the ball no matter what! Tip #17: Spit it out. If the option presents itself to spit or swallow, many women will opt to spit. This doesn't mean you have to be insanely gross about it. There are many women who do not particularly like the taste of ejaculation. Let it run down his member while you finish him off. This is particularly sexy to men, seeing it drip from your lips and tongue. Tip #18: Gobble gobble and swallow it up! This is for you girls who are a little more experienced. The more versed you are in the art of oral, the more you will tolerate or even enjoy swallowing at this point of performing. You can either swallow a little at a time or keep going and swallow it all at once. Again, the main thing to remember is not to stop. Use your hand to help get him completely off. It will only be like a tablespoon, so when it starts to hit your mouth, don't stop to swallow. Use your hands to keep the motion going so that he can climax completely.

Hi Deborah. I think you should respect his commitment to his long term relationship. His integrity is obviously one of the things you like about him. I think you should ask him if he’ll help you find a nice man like him. Maybe one of his friends might be perfect for you. From day one don’t let them take you for granted. And if your friend is their friend, he’ll be setting them a good example.
Terror as a turn-on? It seems that way! University of British Columbia researchers dispatched two sets of men to stand on two separate bridges—one reassuringly sturdy and another that was long, shaky and suspended 230 feet in the air. Next, they sent a beautiful female assistant to ask the two groups to fill out a survey. Those on the precarious bridge gave more risqué answers to her questions. Feeling threatened is linked to arousal in the brain, which may have spurred those men to open up. Who knew anxiety could be such effective foreplay?

I bet you’ve never thought about your dude’s Adam’s apple as an erogenous zone, huh? If you have, congrats, you should probably be writing this instead of me. But for the normies out there, the thought behind this stems from how the thyroid (just below the Adam’s apple) is “closely linked to the sex organs, according to ancient Chinese medicine,” according to reflexologist Mantak Chia, author of Sexual Reflexology.
And no, it doesn’t take away from the sexiness of your dirty talk if you check in with them. It’s a sign of respect. It’s the same well-spring of respect that makes you think to ask your partner if their penis/clitoris prefers softer or firmer stimulation. It doesn’t ruin the mood to check in… it enhances the feelings of safety, comfort, and connection.
Drive him wild: Have your man lie on his stomach and give him a massage by doing light, karate-chop type movements along his sacrum. "Doing this not only stimulates those sacral nerves, but also triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which is key for relaxing, letting go, and having an orgasm," Michaels says. (Related: 7 Tips for a Better Orgasm)
This is Dana I just want you to help with my issue. I met a guy I obsorved his character he is genuine, and kind to everyone. The thing is that he is making me to feel that he likes me but when I started to talk him as a friend, he just telling me tat he got crush on some one else & her age is 22 and few days after he Says tat he is loving a girl from the same premises and she is 24. I didn’t understand what he is trying to tell. My question for you is did he making to jealous or he just wants avoid me.
Saying something as simple as, “I had a very fun dream about you last night” or “I was thinking about you last night before I went to sleep” are both fantastic ways to keep his mind racing and obsessed with you. The fact that these messages aren’t explicit actually makes them more powerful. His mind will naturally fill in the blanks, wondering exactly how dirty your dream was and what you were doing in bed before you fell asleep.

Please your man in bed with kissing him whenever and wherever you are. When you are out and about, make sure you keep giving him loads of kisses so he knows you find him attractive and you can't keep your hands off him. Any kind of closeness is a good thing and the more you find yourselves kissing will give you both the contact you crave for. Being closer together through kissing will give you both the ultimate aim of being closer together in the bedroom. It will please your man immensely to know that the kissing will continue when you are in bed together. Kissing is the one great pleasure a couple can share together on a daily basis. It is the one thing that you can do in private or public that will be such a great turn on for you both.


i really liked your page ..im a lady who's been dating guys whom have been taking me for granted but I have this friend of mine who's a guy I often talk with bout everything he understands me well I like him very much n adore him cause he's different ..he feels hurt each time I breaks up with another guy m actually falling for him but he is in a long term relationship ...sometimes he tels m all his problem and even wishes I was the one he was dating but the unfortunate part is he's says he's commited to his lady ...donno wat to do
“Dirty talk” is perhaps a misnomer, because bedroom banter doesn’t have to be crude to be a turn-on. “Some people find cursing to be completely un-arousing,” says Neustifter. “The words that turn him on might be tender and loving—that can be just as highly arousing,” Jaiya adds. If you’re not sure which he prefers, try alternating sweet phrases (e.g. “I love it when you kiss me”) with more risqué ones (e.g. “I want your [word for penis] inside me.”), and see what revs him up the most. 
The wham-bam days are over. Today's man wants slow, skillful pleasure and plenty of it... to all the usual places, and a few new ones. Based on bestselling sex author/educator Jay Wiseman's underground bestselling Tricks series - "how to make good sex better" - this compilation of juicy ways to spice up your bedroom play has been harvested from sexual experts all over the U.S. New essays on up-to-the-minute safer-sex techniques, the changing sexual roles of men in the new millennium, and male psychology and physiology round out this must-have manual for anyone who's ever wanted to make a man beg for more!
First of all, you should not turn and twist your man because he is not designed as a drag-roll for you. You should really know the keystones to put your man on the altitudes of sexual climax and you need to know that you are not the only one who needs to enjoy sex; he is also there with you to enjoy this natural and the most needed physical activity.

I’ve been dating this guy for about 6 weeks or so. Yes, early days I know, but we have passed a lot of these things. I’ve met his brother, his casual friends and a lot of his close friends. Natural since we’ve known each other for 8 years really. Anyway I feel like I’ve ruined something great. We try and have a date a week, very casual ones though, we feel good around each other, talk is easy, we support each other, have some similar interests and hobbies, and the sex is great. It was only how one date night he was sick and I organised an easy night at his where I would bring over dinner, watch a movie and just hang out. He told me he wasn’t up to it and wanted some alone time. I get that. I have those days too. I also get that plans come up and that if there is a friend you can only see once in a blue moon then you take it. But, does it have to be the same night? Do I have to find out through a third person that he went to a party while sick on the night he wanted to be alone? Now in past relationships I’ve done the bad thing, let these things slide, hurt me and reward them for it; but I didn’t want to do that. I messaged him today – not trusting my voice – with something along the lines of ‘since you believe in honesty is the best policy, next time tell me alone time just means time with anyone but me.’ I told him I’ve been in that type of relationship before and I was really hurt by it. He said he understood and it was inconsiderate before slipping in the whole thing of ‘personally, i’m not looking for a serious relationship right now.’. Ok, I get that. Just shy of two months dating (even though we’ve known each other for 8 years) and we are young! We are only 22. I agreed with him but he also knows that down the line those feelings on my end might change. I also said that if they change for him to let me know since I don’t want to get hurt and I don’t want him to be either. I’ve been in the whole one sided relationship before and the guy really hurt me in that situation. I feel like I’ve ruined it by telling him how I feel since he just slipped in that line and it just felt like another blow. I like this guy, I could see a potential relationship in the future but I’m just scared that even though I said I don’t want a label that he thinks that since i added that months down the line that could change. When that time comes I’m just wondering how to reach him to move from just casual dating to a proper relationship.
Remember, guys are visual by nature. They get turned on by what they see. So, taking care of how you look is a high priority if you want to turn your man on and arouse him. Think of this as a ‘pre’ foreplay tip to use before you even begin touching him. If you are both going to a party together, dressing up in something sexy and hot is going to start turning your man on hours before you start getting physically intimate. This is great for building sexual tension with him.

We also know that there are exceptions. There are relationships that probably should not stay together, such as those with physical violence, cruel and ongoing verbal abuse, extreme anger management issues, or long-term unaddressed substance abuse, for example. If you're in a situation like that, please eek the help of your local crisis management center.
Hi, I am a 61 year old widow and dating a 62 year old man for going on 2 years now, he has never been married or in a serious relationship for any length of time before. He tells me randomly that he loves me and we spend almost all our time together. He is hesitant to move in with me because he says he wants to be 100% sure of his feelings. He says that sometimes he doesn’t feel love or attraction and then other times he does. He hasn’t been with anyone else since we met and we are neighbors and friends and enjoy doing multiple things together. I am trying not to push too hard because I have the feeling he does love me and maybe this will go somewhere. Other times, I doubt his love for me because he doesn’t just come out and make a commitment to me. Am I being too needy in wanting a commitment and him to move in with me after almost 2 years of dating? What advice would you give me in regards to this relationship? I have met his entire family and we spend holidays together with them and I get along great with them. He asks my advice on things and shares details of his past life and relationships and mistakes he has made in life. He also shares all his goals and dreams with me and asks me to help him make decisions on things because he has a hard time making decisions on things. I don’t want to hang on if there will never be love but at the same time I don’t want to let go of something good because he does treat me with respect and will randomly say I love you and is always hugging me and kissing me and doesn’t only demand sex out of the relationship.
Massaging your man’s scalp is one of those forgotten foreplay tips that feels wonderful for your man (and when your man does it to you, too!). You can do it while you are just sitting down beside each other, when you are lying in bed, when you are kissing each other or even while making love, too. But don’t just scrape his head with your nails! To massage his scalp, start from the bottom near the back of his neck or just above his ear.
There’s this common misconception that’s going around which says that foreplay only ever really benefits the ladies. Mainstream chatter dictates that foreplay is a tool that girls use to get their guys to pleasure them and the man is just going to have to put up with it if she’s going to put out for him. But that’s not always the case. If this is how couples use foreplay in their relationships, then they are definitely doing things wrong. First of all, you and your partner should always be making the most out of every opportunity to get intimate with one another.
Why is this a #1 bestseller? Because it is an easy-to-follow, easy-to-stick-to, truly simple approach on talking dirty to your man, the right way, anytime you want, that is based on duplicatable and proven secret research on what type of dirty talk men really like and love, the raw secrets behind what makes one word turn him on, and the others make him limp and laugh, but eliminates the complexity and tendency to leave readers wanting more. If you can understand a traffic light, you can understand these secrets, and permanently become a master at how to talk dirty to a man, boyfriend, husband, or lover the right way without hard work, rejection, embarrassment, failure, or feeling sleazy.
My bf an I have been dating for the past year an a half we don’t live together nor live in the same city, we only really see each other on weekends, it was amazing at first for the first part of the year of being together then all of a sudden he started accusing me of cheating on him with others guys let alone my daughter’s dad that I haven’t been with for 6 plus years, that im using drugs.. so tired of being accused of stupid things I’m ready to start doing them.. do you have any advice?
Got your eye on a guy? Not sure how to approach him, but you’re certain you want him nonetheless? Don’t fret, darling. There are plenty of foolproof ways to get that guy. Playing the field can be hard sometimes –it’s about techniques and patience as much as it’s about timing and confidence. However, no matter how hard you try, or don’t try (because that’s a tactic, too), sometimes the match just isn’t meant to be. When the stars and planets don’t align for the match you thought was made in heaven, don’t get down on yourself.
Trying to string together a full, filthy sentence can actually tamp down your desire, since you’re inside your head, says Jaiya. “When I do sexuality workshops, the word ‘yes’ is consistently one of people’s favorite words,” says Neustifter. Other sexy words that can stand alone: "faster," "harder," and "more." One-word directives let him know he’s doing a great job, says Jaiya. They're the verbal equivalent of a moan.
The predator model of love leads to a hunter's way of dating: Seek large gatherings of your prey, dangle a false self as bait, wait for an individual to stray from the herd, then pounce on him with all the wit and wile it takes to bring him down. Internet matchmaking services, singles bars, speed dating, personal ads and even blind dating all borrow from this "statistical mass" logic. I've seen clients spend years dating this way, entering one briefly exciting, painfully doomed relationship after another. This is not a numbers game. It's a soul search.
Men like women who are in touch with their sexuality. So, he will be more than happy if you start the movements that gradually lead to sex. You initiating sex will make him feel wanted. Be direct but take it slow. For instance, you can put your hand on his leg and work your way up to his tool, ask him to join you, take his hand and guide it to your butt or boobs. He will take it from there—or simply take him to the bedroom and start kissing him. There are a lot of options to use your imagination and you will most definitely shake his.
We believe that every individual no matter which part of the world and any gender should be treated equally in society and has the same right to express its individual thoughts believes, etc. For that reason, we founded www.womennow.in to create a platform on which members of the womennow-community can express and share their daily concerns and believes smog each other.

While your mouth is preoccupied, other parts of your body are available to assist you while you perform oral sex. Tip #9: Use your hand to help stabilize your husband or boyfriend's member. By using your hand(s) to surround the base, you will help keep the blood flow in the organ, which will help keep it hard. Tip #10: If you want to please your man, then use your hand to stroke while your mouth is focused on the tip. If he feels movement at the base of his genitals while your mouth is working the top, then there is extra stimulation. Don't be shy - use some pressure. You aren't looking to tickle him, you are looking to keep him stimulated! Many women prefer to give a hand job as they are giving a blowjob because it helps to keep the blood flowing. Since you need to be cautious about how much your jaw is used because it may begin to ache, your hands will be an excellent substitute and time filler. Also, because you can use a little more pressure with your hands, it will help to keep him hard. Make sure you spit on your hand so that there is no chafing.
Couples so often get into a sex routine — same time of night, same place, same position. And while your husband may not make an active move to change things, men want to have the power to switch up patterns and take total control, says Haltzman. Get out one of his silk ties, have him bind your hands together, and let him take it from there. We suspect you won't regret it.
Hi. I have a huge crush on this guy I've been sleeping with for the past week. He's a mutual friend and we've planned to hang out before, but just recently did so. He's everything I need and I had no idea he would be in my heart so fast. Problem is, he and I both share the 'I'm single' lifestyle, not necessarily looking for a relationship but not really erasing the idea either. We've expressed that we like each other, and we act like a couple does occasionally, but I can't understand the vibe he gives out. He makes me feel special, calls me beautiful and will even tickle me just so he can see my genuine smile. I want a relationship with him more than anything. I mean he's 24, I'm 23. We both own your own property. We both are unable to have children and are okay with that. We're both cancers and like anime. We have the same hobbies and same concepts while still maintaining individuality. I think we'd be perfect, and I've never been more willing to work on forming the best relationship for us. I was wanting to know, how would I likely be able to make a guy think of me as much as I think of him? How do I show him my feelings without coming off as clingy, desperate, or just lonely? Please help at your latest convenience.

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